Delia Latham: Dancing Dialogue, Part III

Part 3 - Dance Like No One's Watching

Silence:

Silence is a powerful tool in dialogue. It can whisper comfort and peace, shout anger and discord, or state a fact more clearly than any words ever could. In the words of an old Keith Whitley song: “You say it best when you say nothing at all.”

Of course, not everything can be said with silence. But some things are communicated with incredible impact by having a character say nothing.

Example:

Noah reached across the table and took her hand.

“Karen, I—” He cleared his throat and squeezed the hand he held. “I’ve fallen in love with you.”

Her eyes widened. For the barest flash of a second, Keith remembered the deer he’d missed by about six inches on the road last night.

Then her hand slid from his, and she stared out the window, apparently enthralled by the darkness that covered the bay.

Uh-oh. Something’s not right, right? Either Karen doesn’t return Keith’s affection, or something is preventing her from saying so.

Employ this tool with care. It can be a valuable part of your writer’s arsenal. But, as with any writing technique, overuse lessens the effect, and can become downright annoying.

Information dumping:

If you’ve been writing for more than two days, you know dumping information on your reader is a no-no. 

Unfortunately, many writers seem to think if information is provided within a conversation, that makes it fine and dandy. Think again.

Yes, dialogue is a great way to let readers know things they need to know about a character’s history, psychological condition, etc., without pages of back story. But even packaged in dialogue and tied in neat little quotation marks, no one wants an entire life’s history shoved down their throat in a single conversation. Spread it out. Drop nuggets of information, and do it in such a way that the reader hardly realizes she’s been fed a slice of back story pie.

Example:

Still holding hands, they approached the antique store. With a chuckle, Tina used her free hand to point at the window, where an old Silver Streak bicycle held prominent place in the eclectic display.

“Look at that old bike, Ross.” She shook her head. “At one time, some kid probably thought he’d been handed the keys to the kingdom when he got that thing on Christmas morning. Can you even imagine?”

Ross stared at the red bike. He didn’t have to imagine. But it hadn’t been Christmas. His old man had put in a lot of work to make it look sharp—it was far from new, even on Ross’s twelfth birthday. But he hadn’t cared. That Silver Streak bicycle was his pride and joy—and ultimately, the thing that destroyed his life forever.

“Ross!” Karen tugged at her hand, finally freeing it from his unwitting clutch-hold. Her shocked gaze captured his. “What’s wrong with you? You were hurting me!”

The reader is given a glimpse into Ross’s past, but not a whole shovelful of it—just a bare glimpse. The reader doesn’t feel as if she’s been taken on a long, boring stroll through history, but her interest is now definitely piqued. Ross’s past holds the promise of some interesting reading further in the book, and you can bet she’s going to keep reading until she unearths that mystery.

Keep it casual:

Most of us do not use a lot formality in our everyday conversation—unless the situation calls for formality: a speech, a job interview, etc. Outside those situations, we don’t speak in a stiff, stilted manner. Neither should our characters, unless that happens to be a (rather unusual) characteristic of that person’s speech.

For instance, when inviting a guest to make herself at home, which of the following more closely represents realistic conversation?

"I desire to ensure you are absolutely comfortable during the time you are staying in my home."

"Please make yourself at home. I want you to be comfortable here."

Clearly, the second choice is closer to what most of us would actually say…and that’s how our character’s should speak, as well.

Use contractions. Most conversations are riddled with them, and we don’t even notice. But we do notice when someone doesn’t use them, because their speech sounds stilted. (For instance, a foreigner might speak English very precisely, and omit contractions. If you have a character to whom English is a second language, then by all means, kill the contractions. That speech pattern will become an easy identifier for that character any time he/she speaks.)

Try reading your dialogue out loud. Actually hearing dialogue can shine a light on anything corny or unrealistic that managed to find its way in there. Better yet, enlist the aid of an honest friend to read the dialogue with you—like a script. You take a role, your friend takes another. You’ll be

surprised how many speech snafus the two of you will uncover, and the result will be a better, more believable conversation for your readers’ enjoyment.

Read. And read some more.

As writers, we are often told to read. We learn by reading. If we don’t read, we can’t write. In the words of Stephen King, “You cannot hope to sweep someone away by the force of your writing until it has been done to you.”

Read with a deliberate mind toward dialogue. What works in the books you most enjoy? What made conversations sparkle and dance? What didn’t work…annoyed you, made you close the book and not open it again? Learn from those things—the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Everything you learn is another step you can apply to your own dancing dialogue…another step away from Wallflower-dom and into the action on the floor.

Dance like no one’s watching…but, as a writer, dance so that everyone will!

Next week: The final dance.

Tweetables:

Dialogue: Make it dance like no one’s watching, and everyone will. @DeliaLatham http://tinyurl.com/pt2z5kv

Dancing Dialogue, Part III, on Write Right! @DeliaLatham http://tinyurl.com/pt2z5kv

DELIA LATHAM is a born-and-bred California gal, raised in a place called Weedpatch and currently living in the lovely mountain town of Tehachapi with her husband and a spoiled Pomeranian. She enjoys multiple roles as Christian wife, mother, grandmother, sister and friend, but especially loves being a princess daughter to the King of Kings. She has a "thing" for Dr. Pepper, and loves to hear from her readers. Contact her through her website or send an e-mail to delia@delialatham.net. Find her also at the following online locations:

Living the Write Life (blog)
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Delia Latham: Finding the Chameleons

"Where do you get your ideas?"

Every published writer has heard this question - probably more than once. 

It's a valid inquiry, but there is no pat answer. The cold, hard fact is—and pardon me if I’m disillusioning anyone, but…—neither babies nor ideas are delivered by a stork with a basket in his beak.

They aren’t for sale on department store shelves.

There’s no recipe for mixing one together, complete with baking instructions.

They can’t be hunted, shot down, beheaded and hung over your doorway as a trophy.

© Can Stock Photo Inc. / shiffti

But they’re out there, hiding in plain sight. Think of them as chameleons. You just have to be willing to play a little hide-and-seek. Chameleons blend into their surroundings, and it takes a sharp eye and intentional observation to spot them. 

Honing the skills to spot those hidden idea gems should be a deliberate daily effort for any writer.

Truth into Fiction

Below is a headline and blurb from Reuter's-Oddly Enough. The headline alone should raise any writer's idea antennae.

Funeral horses stampede, overturn hearse

The story in a nutshell: A hearse overturned when the horses pulling it to a south London cemetery stampeded, dragging the carriage and coffin past appalled relatives and sending floral tributes flying.

This situation is horrifying just as it stands. But let's find the chameleonic ideas hidden in that small paragraph. Time to play "what if"....

• What if the coffin had come open and the body had been thrown out at the feet of the grieving widow?

• What if that body was not the one it should have been?

• What if the coffin was empty? (Where's the deceased? Why would anyone steal his/her corpse?)

• What if there were two bodies in the casket? (Who is the additional body? Did the mortician put it there? If so, why?)

We could find another half dozen story ideas from this one sad little article. But by now you see the "hidden picture."

Beyond the Obvious

A woman and a child sit nearby while you wait to board a flight. The child has hauntingly beautiful eyes. She does not say a word, and displays none of the expected impatient fidgeting, no squirming in her seat, no whining about being bored, no curious inquiries about the upcoming flight. The mother never releases the little girl's hand, and then...you notice tears. Mommy is weeping.

As a writer, your mind should be very busy by now.

Why is this child so quiet? Is she mute? Maybe some trauma has stolen her vocal ability. What trauma? Is Mommy sending the little one away? Where might she send the child...to an ex-husband? A medical facility for post-traumatic disorders?

What if, instead of simply holding her hand, Mommy has the child on a safety harness? Why would this be necessary? Is the child dangerous in some way? Why would she be dangerous?

Where would you take this scene? Would you have questions other than the ones I asked?

If You Could See What I Hear

In a cozy little coffee shop, you wait for a friend to join you. She's ten minutes late, and you're starting to be a bit annoyed. But, like the good writer you are, you're tuned in to what's going on around you—which is why you hear this little bit of idea fodder from the adjoining booth:

"You can't go back there, Teri. I won't let you!"

By the time your lunch partner arrives yet another ten minutes later, you've filled up a whole page in the notebook you carry with you everywhere you go. Your notes might look like this:

"You can't go back there, Teri. I won't let you!"

• Back where? To an abusive husband? Disreputable job?

• Scientific experiments! Maybe she's been taking test drugs and they're doing awful things to her. (What things? Are the results visible? Behavioral? Physical?)

• Will Teri really be prevented from going where she wants to go? Is the passionate statement a threat? Are the women sisters...friends...mother and daughter? Is the statement a warning, a threat, or just a way of speaking?

Coming up with ideas from everyday circumstances is like a mental muscle…it withers away from lack of use. So then, what's the best way to tone muscles? Through exercise, of course. Strengthen, tighten and tone your observation and idea-spotting muscles by working them...every day.

How does one exercise that kind of muscle? Let me count the ways! Take the exercises below and run with them, but don't stop there—come up with some of your own.

•          Find a good website or buy a book that provides daily writing prompts. Here's the kicker: Don't just read the prompts—carry them out! You aren't practicing until you're doing something. You’ll find an enormous amount of help and information here: http://www.creative-writing-now.com/
•          Take a walk, go shopping (people watching), volunteer somewhere (exposure to a world of experiences), etc. Ideas are hiding in life, and you must live if wish to see them.
•          Flip through the pages of a magazine or browse photos on a stock photo site online. Choose three photos that grab your attention for whatever reason. Create a storyline around those photos.
•          Free write. Set your timer for 15-30 minutes, then sit down and start writing. Don’t plan. Don’t worry if it makes sense, or whether one sentence relates to the next. Just write whatever comes to mind. You’ll be surprised what nuggets you can glean from these sessions.
•          Perhaps most importantly...pull out the old enthusiasm and fervor that you wore like a cloak when you first started writing. You need that garment again, and guess what? It still fits.

Are you ready to play a game of hide-and-seek with the chameleons?

Delia Latham is a born-and-bred California gal, currently living in the beautiful mountain town of Tehachapi with her husband Johnny and a Pomeranian she calls Boo. She’s a Christian wife, mother, grandmother, sister, and friend—but above all, she treasures her role as child of the King and heir to the throne of God. She’s got a “thing” for Dr. Pepper and absolutely loves hearing from her readers.

You can contact Delia at any of the following locations:

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